When I first took my partner down to meet my parents, we were returning from a weekend getaway in Monterey. We went out to a nice dinner and then headed to their house to relax & socialize for a bit before continuing our journey back home to San Francisco. The conversation (inevitably) turned toward my childhood & whatever embarrassing pictures could be displayed or stories related.We ended up focusing on my early childhood years...

I was lucky to go to an awesome preschool. I don't have many concrete memories of it (I'm more of an emotional memory kind of kid--I remember how things *feel* rather than how they actually *were*), but I remember it being one of the happiest times of my life. Getting messy, learning new information about the world, hanging out with all my besties, climbing anything in front of me, having camp-outs, playing with animals, roughhousing...you get the idea.

One of the things the preschool did was have parents create scrapbooks for their kids--one of the coolest things ever, in my humble opinion. I mean, not only capturing pictures of me at that age, but my artwork & words put down verbatim--oh the things I said! And man, that tendency to tell stories? Definitely inborn. Also inborn? We chuckled at the part that described my personality: 'Shy, strong-willed, aggressive' (yep,...

Yesterday I sent out an appeal on behalf of the National Sexuality Resource Center, asking our community to call in to reject Orrin Hatch's sneaky attempts to add $250 million for abstinence-only education into the health reform package. Thanks to all of you who made calls.

Today, I came in to work to find this email in my in box:

"Hi - I just had to comment about your cheesecake photo that went out with a letter urging people to reject abstinence-only sex education.  While I agree with the philosophy and am familiar with the research documenting the failure of that type of sex education, the style of photo you chose to include with the email was overtly sexual and undermined your message. I agree that 'sex sells' but this seems, to me, to set the wrong tone for an important issue.  A more business-like image would have convinced me, but I don't feel comfortable forwarding the letter to other friends to request their support."

I was dumbfounded. And saddened. And disappointed, that a woman anthropology professor--one who probably considers herself progressive on gender and sexuality issues (she is on our mailing list, after all)--would not take me seriously because of the way I looked. And even worse, that she would try to shame...

In our graduate seminars, we talk a lot about race and color, including how whiteness is cherished and celebrated in and outside the United States.

These class discussions and other conversations with my fellow students and friends made me think about the various fairness products that are marketed and sold back home. (In no way am I trying to be the voice of my nation. These are just MY views on such 'beauty' products.)

Here's a fine example of what I'm talking about:

So clearly, once you're beautiful (i.e. fair, white) you can achieve anything! Name, fame, money and power! You can realize your inner dreams and talents 'cos opportunities are endless!

So what happens if you're not fair? Well, basically then you're nobody! You're boring, unwanted and invisible. Your life sucks! (and not in a pleasurable way!)

...

[Editor's note: this blog was originally a comment on the XX-Why? IAAF out of Caster Semenya's Pants petition.]

Controversy and a lot of prurient interest exploded into the news this week when South African Caster Semenya outran her competition in the 800m world championships by a more than two second lead, only to be accused of cheating by being intersex. As an intersex person following this story, I've felt . . . well, largely appalled by what spews from the mouths of competitors, sport officials, news commentators, bloggers, and eyebrow waggling, head-shaking people on the street. It's hard not to feel depressed encountering innumerable snarky statements such as this one: "South African runner Caster Semenya (hehehe...she has semen in her name...hehehe) won the gold in the women's 800-meter at the World Championships in Berlin last night, but officials may snatch (peen, I mean, pun intended) away her victory if it turns out she's really a dude." (That one can be found here, if you're really inclined to read it.) So I wanted to share my perspective on this story. I do apologize to Caster for joining the pile of people giving her no privacy, but as the media are overflowing with details of her life...

On Monday, June 22 the National Sexuality Resource Center sponsored a panel discussion of the film Still Black:A Portrait of Black Transmen after the film’s Frameline debut as a part of the NSRC’s Summer Institute on Race, Gender, and Sexuality. Panelists included JayR Rosemon from Dimensions Clinic; Zion Johnson founding member of the Lou Sullivan Society; Shawn Demmons, an MPH Candidate San Francisco State University and a Point Foundation Scholar; and Amy Sueyoshi, Associate Professor of Ethnic Studies and Sexuality Studies at San Francisco State University.

Amy Sueyoshi agreed to share her comments from that panel in my blog. Her comments are a valuable resource for sexuality educators interested using Still Black in the classroom as a tool for teaching about sexuality, gender, and race.

I know what you are thinking. Cocktales? WTF is Cocktales? Please let me explain. Cocktales is not some new gay club opening in the Castro that centers on men’s cocks with hella cheap happy hour specials. There will be no Black Supermen or Asian Hotties being served at the bar—if you never had one, please speak with your bartender IMMEDIATELY cause you missing out. Cocktales, my friends is something completely not alcohol related. KEEP READING! Cocktales is really apart of a new men’s social campaign, The Men’s Story Project, that provides a forum for men to share their personal stories about social ideas of masculinity, gender socialization, and how they navigate their journey to manhood. In a society where men are constantly inundated with ideas and values that suggest the only way to be a man is to fuck bitches and get money, the Men’s Story Project says NO. For all my academics out there let me spit it to you like this- Cocktales is a social project that provides a forum for all men to share stories that highlight the intersections between race, gender, sexuality, religion, and class. It questions hegemonic notions of masculinity while simultaneously agitating normative and hetero-normative beliefs and ideologies that have been strategically created and deployed to police...

Yesterday my "brazilian mom" called me into the living room and told me watch the news with her. "You know what's happening?" she asked, her eyes heavily focused on me. "No what?" I mumbled to her in portuguese. "A nine year-old girl in [the state of] Pernambuco was raped by her step-father and impregnated with twins. She was granted an abortion yesterday and now the archbishop of Recife Olinda has called for the ex-communication of her, her family and the doctors that performed the abortion."

I am currently in Rio de Janeiro on a Fulbright scholarship studying development and it's relationship to reproductive and sexual health and rights in Brazil. I was an exchange student here 10 years ago and had no idea I'd be back hanging out with my host family for awhile before I begin my project. I must say that I really hate the fact that this is my first blog post on this journey.  This is the kind of story that makes you feel like you have a big black hole where your heart used to be, which automatically gives you indigestion. I really wanted my first post to be about my struggle hating and loving the rigid gender roles here in Brazil. (Yes, I admit it. I love getting my nails done evey week and buying shoes like they just might be the last pair on earth. However, I'm not sure I can handle the braziian bikini (who knew I had all those stretch marks stripped across my ass?) or the brazilian bikini wax, and I can't believe I actually thought about getting botox...

I drive to campus daily. On my commute, I have noticed a growing number of “sex can wait” messages on billboards carried by the communications company Clear Channel. In each of the ads, we see young brown people prominently featured. These “sex [act] can wait” billboard messages support messages that are clearly promoting what Dr. Gil Herdt calls “sexual ignorance” in our society. We know there is a powerfully aggressive resistance in American culture towards any real attempts put forth to demystify sexuality, especially when considering the youth of the nation. This resistance to endowing the young with sexual literacy stems from multiple locations of power (education system, political system, religion, the institution of family) and permeates the social structure on every conceivable level. This being such, the billboards eventually lead me to wonder what a counter-message would say.

Would it speak about the beauty and power of human sexuality? Or would it invite commuters to find out about how satisfying sex can be when you have a sound background in sexual education regardless of ones, age, sexual orientation or level of income? Simply thinking about a billboard sponsored by the National Sexuality Resource Center for example, made me wonder, how do...

(Crossposted on Equality Loudoun)

This has got to break some sort of record for stupid.

Yesterday, I heard a man equate the sacrifices made by Thomas Beatie so that he and his wife could have children, with the crowd of idiots who trampled a man to death so they could get inside a Wal-Mart to go shopping. No kidding, this was on (OMG!) "Janet Parshall's America" (see here for more on that). The man is named Wesley J. Smith, and he writes a blog about bioethics and "the importance of being human." Bioethics is a big subject, and Wesley J. Smith may well have something insightful to say about some aspect of it, for all I know. But that possibility now seems remote to me, given that he knows so little and displays absolutely no inquisitiveness about something as central to being human as gender.

Here is the "reasoning" involved in his placing those two completely opposite events in the same category, something he calls "coup de culture": He thinks they are both illustrations of "hedonistic people" who are self-centered and think they should get what they want when they want it, no matter what it takes. He may have a point with the Wal-Mart shoppers; as I recall, they refused to stop shopping even after learning that they had trampled a man...

For those of you who haven’t heard, facebook has joined the rank of the ‘Your breasts are there just for me to look at” club, whose members ‘til now included airlines, malls, nude sunbathing opponents and a bunch of teenage boys (sorry boys, I know you are well ahead of airlines and Facebook when it comes to the fine details of anatomy, biological function, and voyeurism).

It turns out that Facebook has been quietly removing the photos of breastfeeding women from their site—if they are obscene, of course, which only involves any sighting of that oh-so-erotic nipple that their baby is impudently hanging on to in order to, you know. eat and live.

On December 27th, Facebook members held a virtual nurse in, uploading breastfeeding photos to their pages, and updating their status to ‘Hey Facebook, breastfeeding is not obscene,”--also the name of the online group.

I joined. I breastfed my son to the elderly age of 16 months, enduring...